To Rathaus civil servants in Siegen Germany

I doubted several times for writing it to the public, but today I could not hold it back anymore. Upon receiving a letter from Rathaus (city hall) Siegen, I know that I need to change my student residential status to job seeker status. Normally in Germany, student could get a 18 months jobseeker status. However, my passport is valid for about 16 months for now. So I called the Rathaus civil servant who signed the letter to me, here, pay attention, my question was only this — “do I need to renew my passport in order to get 18 months job seeker status, since my passport expires in 16 months?” In other words, I wanted to know whether issuing the job seeker status is in compaliance with the valid dates of passport, or say, whether it is necessary to renew my passport. 

Instead of answering directly “yes, it is according to your passport valid dates, so if you want 18 months, please renew your passport”, she said “If you don’t find a job in 16 months, I don’t think you could find a job in another two more months!”

Shame on me, I repeatedly said I understood what she meant, meaning, from her humiliating answer, I understood that it is according to my passport valid date. How simple could an answer be? And how low could I position myself in this situation? No one wants to have a word with them. But I wonder why should she stand on the moral high ground and judging people, making unnecessary judgements towards a situation that no one could literally tell? Who gave her the power? People?

I know it’s civil servants’ daily fun. When we complain about tea sipping, newspaper reading civil servants in China, in the Kafkasque castle sitting the same people, waiting to tell you how worthless and pathetic you are to be in a place that ranks high in all index world wide. 

This is not the first time, neither the last time I will come across this. In Rathaus, foreigners keep heads low, sucking on whatever they could give. Certainly, she doesn’t believe on the two months miracle.

But is it possible to ask these civil servants to open a tiny bit their mind? Not me, or any students, or any refugees deserve this. My wish to have a more improved situation is always there, alas, it’s not coming yet. It is disappointed to hear these words from civil servants, or civil serpents.

Perhaps, I’m writing it out of anger, out of revenge. It’s normal emotions echoing the “two month miracle” issue. Still, does it make her feel better for judging me not finding a job? I assume it does, otherwise, what kind of sick job disease is this. 

Proud of myself being polite from beginning to the end in the phone call. God bless the hollow statement “all people are created equal”. 

The Voice We Should All Hear

This book should be put in the shelf called Books That Made Me Cry, if not, still I should apologise for categorising it on my Russia book shelf, it is about Belarus, Ukraine, also the USSR. It’s quite different, isn’t it? But the people are the same. As always, people remain the same people.

Then there comes the threshold — Chernobyl catastrophe, yet a doomed to be muted one. In the beginning and in the end contains two heart breaking love stories with the only one survivor narrating. People got some relief seeing in Schindler’s List two Jewish Lovers could got married with a melted gold ring under that extreme circumstance, at least. But in this book, there is no future, no happiness, no end.

It happened contemporarily, a modern nuclear war already. It is still happening. I mean, the same way certain government conducts things, dealing with crisis, it is all the same. What left are only nameless people, heroes, or just say, human beings, sacrificing their lives, for the mankind, for many other people. Without them, half of the Europe will be gone, the proud yet not proud Europe. Can anyone imagine? A great deal of civilisation will be erased, vanished from the earth. Maybe that was also the goal for certain people, since other groups of people need to be liberated from the burning hell.

Heroes, there are always nameless, only people who does not leave their names could be called heroes, the real ones. That’s our Chinese old saying. Those who are named, in the history book, in the real history, they are not!

I wish I could read this book much earlier, knowing Chernobyl is not only what they described on the text book for exams: a nuclear leaking accident. That’s too easy. Why don’t we get to know this? Because people will be panicked about nuclear, and we still are building them. Why don’t they get masks and protections? Because if they get, people will get panicked. Oh, now I know how important it is for the Communist government to keep things under control, in order, tidy and clean, and what they are willing to get as a price. Astonishing.

I’ve always admired Russian people for their toughness (maybe it’s not the right portray here). Like this, when they believe the world will get to hear their voices in one day, they keep believing it, and eventually it happened. It’s the belief. Touching. Yet, they have the ability to reflect, and to say it, to record it, to try to prevent it.

The form of the book is oral history. And it’s perfect. History does not only compose of famous people and leaders, this misleads many people nowadays who wants to climb up and be heard, but there are so many nameless people, they carved the history with their own precious lives, and in this case, maybe several generation’s lives. They have a voice, a collective memory, a right to live, but certain things were disguised and deprived from them. And life goes on. People forget and keep silence. Svetlana Alexievich uses a Journalistic way to record these tragedies, but it’s the cold-blooded reality. What’s literature? It’s a collection based on these life stories, these life and death momoents.

I really wish more and more people reads this book, simply.